Tuesday, July 22, 2008

life is too real nowadays to keep up with this.

i just heard a guy tell a very irish looking lady, "hey, thank you for being native american."

ive taken to writing with pen and paper lately.

im too distracted and unsatisfied otherwise.

plans to flee. not sure when. money keeps setting things back.

oh mexico. oh family. you have my heart.

everything else isnt quite real enough.

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

family. familia.

so today my grandma made it to our house. we traveled to storage scavenging for an old phone to replace my broken one. my mom seriously had like the old 80's cell phones still. we finally found one that might do, but i think it's broken too.

tomorrow one of my...3rd? yes 3rd cousins will arrive. i pick him up from the airport in the early morrow. he's the kind who cannot be tamed. his heart is wild, and his head is worse. he's lived everywhere and then some.

thursday ramona finally gets here. thank the Lord. i will not be able to survive our hundreds of family that i do not know without her. i want us to do something sporadic. but that cannot be planned, so ill just stop talking about it right now.

all this family for a three day family reunion. we have tons of family coming from all over just for these three days in washington. my mom and other family has put soooo much effort into it, so i hope it goes swimmingly.

today my mom made refried beans. made some tortillas and there was lunch and dinner. it smells like the freshed of mexican food in my house. and i cannot get enough of it. hopefully i'll be able to document the three day reunion by photo.

in other news. im really trying to go to mexico soon. maybe september. october. maybe all of those months plus two. if i can, ill take a quarter or two down there. the thing is i just really need to get to know my dad's family. it's been weighing on my heart. i also want to learn to speak spanish fluently. and they barely speak english, so it's perfect. when im a teacher i want to be a spanish speaking teacher, just to be more flexible. when my phone starts to work again im going to talk to my uncle about it.

that's enough rambling.

Sunday, July 6, 2008

happy fourth of july

this weekend was spectacular
i dont know why
i havent had this pleasurable of a weekend in a looong time
i was with people i loved constantly

on friday we had a nice party at erikas
with the best fireworks show in the U.S.
serrah almost killed everyone
i got to dance with sparklers
and so did everyone else
many clever remarks were shared
we made a nice spiked punch
and i ate a bison hamburger.


saturday i spent my $25 gift card at barnes and noble. i got:
a cocktail book,
how to make all kinds of soup book,
and viva la vida
well spent not-my-money
we three shared words, and watched a movie.

then i got dressed up with my girls from work.
ate thai, my first time.
looked sexy.
had excellent, well priced drinks.
and i won a free chocolate cake for beating the waiter in a "mind game."

went back to erikas.
snuggled in bed.
shared words for a couple hours.
and then fell asleep to Hook.

today i went to a bbq with the work girls.
played cricket
ate another hot dog
corn on the cob
i was definitely the best cricket player
relaxed in the sun
and now my hair smells like the outdoors

i feel very blessed to have such a happy weekend

Friday, July 4, 2008

oh chipper



but most importantly
i need to be with kids
im going crazy
i feel so under-stimulated.
so useless

a couple of days ago i saw a kid's parents, from YMCA camp. i was so excited, even though he wasn't with them. we'll call him "jeremy." and i told them to tell "jeremy" i said hello. and that i missed him. he was always one of my favorite older kids. a kid that made me happy, and made me feel like i was good at what i was doing. plus he was pretty nice to my younger group. so i adored him. everyone knew it. his parents knew it. they joked about him always having a crush on me. i wished them the best, we talked briefly about camp, and my night was made. i told everyone i knew about how excited it made me.

well. two days later, while i was doing my best to stop these stinky women from stealing our 60%, dirt cheap, sandals "jeremy" walked in! he told me about camp this year. told me all of the kids that were there. apparently his parents had told him they saw me, Chipper (my camp name), and he came up with a sneaky way to visit me. i could not have been happier. i spent about five minutes talking to him. in awe of how mature he had gotten over a 9 month period. i do not think i could have had a better two days at work, thanks to him.

i resolve to always find a way to work with kids. even if it's just volunteer. you know, before i am a teacher.
it makes me the happiest person alive to be with youth.,, people who are satisfied with just playing outside. hearing the same stories over and over again. ah i just feel so empty without kids in my life right now.

and this feeling must be quenched.

Thursday, July 3, 2008

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

i miss camp



today, while driving out of my neighborhood
i saw a little girl, maybe four years old, with short black hair pulled together in a messy pony tail. she was lugging around a donut swim toy, and a broom in the middle of the street. it was the sweetest picture. i wanted to capture that moment so bad. alas! no camera on hand.

i miss working with children. i see kids and i just want to drop everything im doing and go play, go lead a game, go explore the world while teaching them at the same time.